My Mythicality: Stop and Celebrate
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A few years back I was planning a huge birthday trip for a friend when I developed a theory on turning 30. See, I’ve not met many women who are excited to turn 30 because that milestone seems to hold so much pressure for us. I remember dreading my 30th birthday because I felt like a failure. I wasn’t married, I had no kids, I didn’t have my dream house and my car was by no means impressive. See, the longer I “waited” for these big life moments the more people would try to comfort me by saying stuff like, “At least you’re not thirty yet.” or “Well, as long as you’re married by thirty, you’ll be fine.” I know they meant well but it was like a deadline had been put on so many of my dreams and that deadline was “THIRTY”. I know I’m not the only one who has felt this way because so many women have shared these experiences with me over the years. If I could have taken off work that day I would have and when I arrived at work I found that my sweet coworkers had decorated my door and even had a sash and crown waiting for me. It’s the first and only time in my life that I did not want to wear a crown. It felt like I had failed a major project and that does not work for this AP kid!
Now, skip ahead a few years… the birthday trip I was planning was for my friend’s 35 and we started calling it her “Thirty-Fine” trip because she is pretty dang awesome and that has only gotten better with age. Through the experiences of that trip we came to the conclusion that the big celebration should be for turning 35 because you can actually celebrate and enjoy yourself. See, everyone of the ladies on that trip had DREADED or were DREADING turning 30 and everything that seemed to come with it but by 35 your perspective is a little more accurate.
At 30, I was still confused and immature about a lot of things in life. I thought others’ expectations for me were the Gospel truth and if I failed to meet those expectations, I failed as a person. I’ve since learned to create my own deadlines, to not allow others to create pressure unintentionally and not to create pressure for myself because of unmet expectations. Would I prefer a different timeline in my life? Of course because I’m impatient and stubborn but I’ve also so the blessings that have come out of doing it God’s way and who I’ve become in those waiting seasons. I also learned that in many ways, we were lied to and the excitement of life doesn’t dwindle as you age but rather, it has just begun! I have more money, wisdom, common sense and appreciation to enjoy life than I had in the whole of my 20s and my squad has all said the same thing which is why we think your big celebration should be 35 or 40… when you get the job or run that 5K... when you recognize your own value or dance outside your comfort zone. All of those are big moments to celebrate because like a kaleidoscope, those pieces add beautiful colors to your life.
So, here’s to 35! The best is yet to come!!!