ReVisited: Less Bitter, More Glitter
I thought that last year when I revisited my “Less Bitter, More Glitter” post from 2019 I had learned all I could since that revelation but this morning at 4:30 I had another realization that made me so incredibly grateful and that realization is this… God’s not done with us… EVER! See, I thought I had grown as much as I could but luckily the Lord doesn’t just bring us out of a season and leave us there. He always has a new season.
In 2018, when the Lord got a hold of me in what I refer to as my “less bitter, more glitter” season, the first thing that kind of woke me up to Him trying to get my attention was when He quite literally woke me up before daylight. I’m not a morning person by nature and would typically sleep as late as humanly possible before rushing to get ready for work. I was lucky if I could get up before 6:45! Then, out of the blue I started waking up at 5:30 every morning and I’m talking WIDE awake which generally took me an hour to accomplish. As I said in my original post, I sure tried to go back to sleep for about a week and a half before it ever occurred to me that this might be the Lord trying to have a conversation with me when I was the least distracted. So, up I got at 5:30 to talk to God about everything that was on my mind and that hasn’t really changed in the last three years until recently…
About a week ago I woke up around 4:15 and didn’t think much of it beyond being a stressed teacher. However, I have been consistently waking up between 4:00 and 4:30 every morning since then which leads to my grateful revelation this morning. As I stared at my ceiling, I thought, “What if this is the start of a new season? What if this isn’t stress but God?” So, I started my morning chat with God a few moments later. It’s amazing that I used to sleep until 6:45 and I left my house before then this morning!
Here’s what I’m grateful for in spite of needing extra caffeine today…
God won’t allow me to stop growing.
I hope we’re never too old to learn new things or grow in new ways. When my current season began I was terrified of all it might hold because I was afraid the Lord would take me outside my comfort zone and He most definitely did! I also thought that if I could meet all these new challenges then I would be at the pinnacle of my growth. I’m glad I’m wrong! I hope I haven’t peaked and I can’t help but believe the best is yet to come because God is writing the story. It reminds me of the scene in “Boy Meets World” when Mr. Feeny compares our growth to a plant stuck in a small pot. I don’t want to smother in my tiny flower pot if I can flourish in the garden… even if it hurts to pull my roots up!
The future is still unknown but not nearly as scary as I once thought.
The Lord pretty much had to drag me kicking and screaming into my last season of growth. I had a full blown toddler style temper tantrum with Him and He was unfazed by my immaturity. I’m thankful to say that my perspective has changed significantly in the last few years which I truly came to appreciate this morning watching the sun come up. My thoughts didn’t immediately turn to fear but rather I thought “Buckle up, buttercup!” because I KNOW that the Lord is about to do things beyond my wildest dreams. Am I a bit apprehensive? Without a doubt! Am I also excited and expectantly waiting? YES!!!
Hindsight is STILL 20/20.
As I was getting ready this morning I was marveling at what the future might hold and some of the “dots” in the “connect the dots” of my life kind of lit up for me. Several moments from the past few years now look like preparation not frustration. I’m seeing clarity in areas that felt confusing. Isn’t God amazing like that? If you’ve been around here a bit then you know I love looking back on the milestones that lead to big moments. I even write stuff in my journal just in case it becomes relevant later. I guess I love seeing how God can weave an incredible story that I couldn’t see coming. Like a twist ending in a movie! But just like that movie I won’t always know the outcome but I’m still called to be faithful. I know I may never fully understand all my moments but it’s so fun to watch God show up and show out!
So, as I sit here on what I think is a precipice of change I pray that I am brave enough to skip alongside the Lord sprinkling glitter everywhere I go and growing in the process.