True Love

“If I marry: He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, as one has said he reaches all the way to heaven. His shoulders must be broad enough to bear the burden of a family. His lips must be strong enough to smile, firm enough to say no, and tender enough to kiss. Love must be so deep that it takes its stand in Christ and so wide that it takes the whole lost world in. He must be active enough to save souls. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a little child.” ~Ruth Bell Graham

In the modern age, being married a decade is considered an impressive feat, much less, being married six but that is exactly what Billy and Ruth Graham accomplished. I read once that she never intended on getting married because she thought her life was headed in a different direction but she said, “If I marry: He must be so tall that when he is on his knees, as one has said he reaches all the way to heaven. His shoulders must be broad enough to bear the burden of a family. His lips must be strong enough to smile, firm enough to say no, and tender enough to kiss. Love must be so deep that it takes its stand in Christ and so wide that it takes the whole lost world in. He must be active enough to save souls. He must be big enough to be gentle and great enough to be thoughtful. His arms must be strong enough to carry a little child.” I think we can all agree that the Lord provided just that because her desire was God’s to begin with.

Love and romance are part of a beautiful design from the Father that has been warped by Satan to bring us confusion and not clarity, heartbreak and not healing and forgeries instead of forevers. If you look at men and women as reflections of God’s image (Genesis 1:27) and marriage as a reflection of heaven and our relationship to the Father (Isaiah 54:5) we can see a hazy picture of what God intended. We can vaguely grasp how husbands and wives were designed as beautifully interconnected puzzle pieces that compliment the relationship with their own unique strengths. We can also see how far we have stumbled away. We have somehow come to believe that the purpose of a spouse is to give you butterflies, sex and to split the mortgage payment. Satan is delighted that marriage is under attack more today than ever and that includes in the church.

I know I don’t have any “real world” experience with marriage being that I’m single as a Pringle but ultimately the key to any good relationship, romantic or otherwise, is communication and love. Unfortunately, we have come to believe love is a feeling and not a choice because that makes it easier when we become dissatisfied or frustrated. Communication has to be intentional as well because if it isn’t, there will come a point when it just doesn’t happen. It’s like exercising or eating healthy. If I waited until I wanted to do burpees or for the moment I chose a salad over a burger, I’d be waiting for a long, long time. The Bible teaches that in all relationships, if you treat others how you hope they treat you and they do the same than everyone is more than taken care of in time. In fact, I bet if we followed this more often we would actually have better love and care because I am far more compassionate with someone else than I am with myself.

Ultimately, any relationship that has a foundation of faith and shares the common desire to please God over anything else, is far more likely to be successful, which is what I pray for my family, friends, myself and each of you.