Looking back on writing this post two years ago, I remember all of these things being so far outside of my comfort zone and thinking that I could never change. While I still agree that our comfort zones aren’t always logical and I definitely still hate bridges over water, I have changed a lot in the years since my original assessment.
I originally said that I had unintentionally stretched my comfort zones but since then I have intentionally tried to stretch my comfort zones even though that is still an uncomfortable place for me at times however I have come to understand all the amazing things that can lie just outside your comfort zone. As I’ve said before, growth during one season may be preparation for the next season. Also, I can honestly say that the comfort zones I mentioned have changed significantly.
Originally, I wrote of hating to post on social media because I tended to overanalyze everything and had anxiety around my perfectionist leanings. At the time, I was attempting to post more on social media and even had a new year’s resolution around that concept. Now, I post on social media with little thought not because I’ve suddenly become a social media queen but because I have worked to shift my perspective.
I also discussed how I would hide my insecurities and embrace my perfectionism through makeup but how I was working to feel comfortable in my own skin, with or without the help of concealer. So, have I stopped wearing makeup? Become a queen of the natural look? Nope, I’ve actually almost perfected applying false lashes. Ha! But I have come to realize that I can enjoy the creativity of doing my makeup without using it as a crutch or mask. I no longer carry my makeup bag for touch ups after work and I don’t get too stressed when I look an absolute mess. That’s life. I may not like it but I don’t have to let that be a personal criticism.
My favorite comfort zone to look back on is the one concerning my love life and my embarrassing inability to speak to an attractive man without stumbling over my words. You want to talk about a wakeup call. This is the one that was a sign of a host of other hang ups which I have since unraveled. I know this is going to be shocking to those of you who know me well, but it turns out that I was overcomplicating matters, overthinking EVERYTHING and requiring perfection from myself in a way that I would never require of another person. (Insert eyeroll here.)
My growth in this area is so great that I find the entire thing to be hysterical and ridiculous now. This thing that literally once made me want to vomit and paralyzed me in fear is something that doesn’t bother me in the same way. Now, don’t get me wrong. I have not become a dating guru that has men lining up to go out but I have recognized my self sabotaging ways. Turns out it was my perspective of self, not my perspective of these guys, that needed to be clarified.
I was right about one thing back then, having a crew around you to help with recognizing your toxic habits, to push you outside of your comfort zone and to cheer you on in the process is of utmost importance. Your community matters!
So, have I reached the end of my comfort zone? Have I finally become fearless? Of course not! Actually, I’ve just found a new boundary line where I need to grow and learn but that’s okay because I’m being prepared for my next season. I pray in whatever the Lord is growing you right now that you will learn to breathe through the process and step out in faith. Even the most trivial matters can be part of your story so bring it all to the Father. I promise He’s waiting and listening.