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Book Review: “Me, Myself & Lies: What to Say When You Talk to Yourself” by Jennifer Rothschild

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I originally picked up this book because Jennifer Rothschild is coming for a women’s event at my church this fall and I wanted to get a sneak peek at her heart. Of course, I know of Rothschild from all of her Bible studies and the books we have in the church library but I’ve somehow never managed to read one until now. I wasn’t sure which I should start with but when I saw this title I knew it was meant for me. Yes, I do talk to myself and I had a personal realization a few years back on how damaging my talk had been so I was glad to gain some insight from another perspective.

First let me say that this book spoke volumes to my soul and that has a lot to do with the fact that Rothschild and I seem to have similar struggles. If I were to guess, I’d say she was an enneagram 1w2 which is the reverse of my 2w1 meaning we struggle with perfectionism, saying no and more. Many of the personal stories she told were so in line with moments I’ve experienced and as always, I take hope in not being the only one to struggle with these topics.

The book, itself, is broken down into two sections. The first contains her reasoning on what soul talk is and why we need to clean out our thought closet. As I said earlier, I had a bit of this realization a few years back but I’ve never heard it described like this and it’s pretty spot on. I also like that she gives the reader a peek into the “thought closets” of other women of the faith. Once again, as a woman, I like to know I’m not the only one struggling. Social media has created this idea that everyone has it together but you so it’s nice to see the humanity of others laid out just as you view yours daily.

The second section deals with the things you need to speak to your soul. I’ve mentioned before that I had a mentor who always reminded us to “listen to ourselves less and talk to ourselves more” and that is basically the concept presented. She offers suggestions like…

Does this feed my purpose?

Who is the real enemy here?

Why are you in despair?

Chill out!

Who I am and what I struggle with are not the same thing.

Rothschild also reminds us that this is a daily mission and not a quick fix makeover. We have to work daily to keep our thoughts in check, especially those thoughts that we’ve become real comfortable with over the last few decades. Sometimes, I don’t even realize a thought is a lie or damaging because Satan repeated it to me until I would repeat it to myself. That’s a knot that has to be undone over time and not easily let go of if we’re honest. It’s a bit like that dress you have in the back of your closet that is from an important event in your life. It’s out of date, ugly as all get out and you know you will never wear it again but letting go is hard because it’s been there for so long. We can be sentimental for the good and the comfortable. And YES, toxic things can feel comfortable to us when the good things feel so foreign.

So, if your inner monologue is something you would never say to your best friend or pastor’s wife, then maybe you need to reevaluate your speech and give yourself a closet makeover. It will be so worth it!


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